Thiamin and the Braindead Crocodile

A few who know me from college who have the same lessons as me will already know this, but read on because its good stuff!

Basically, i've found out about these crocodiles that was found in a lake in America. Scientists found out that they were suffering from a Thiamin deficiency because some fish that had moved into the area had been taking all the Thiamin from the water in that area. So these crocodiles were suffering from syptoms like decreased brain function and because of this they were drowning underwater because they couldn't move, which is quite sad but...the little ba**ards wouldn't think twice about biting our legs off so why should i feel sorry for them anyway?!

So this inspired me to think, like always. Are we humans at risk of an outbreak??

Apparently, from doing research about this, i've found out that causes of Thiamin deficiency include, binge drinking. SHOCK HORROR!!
Britain is, in my eyes, a nation full of pissheads so i'm thinking we're on the brink of a full scale outbreak of spazos.

Effects of Thiamin deficiency sound awful some of the more serious ones are the increased risk of cancer (not sure if that is completely accurate), swelling of the heart, less energy and muscle cramp. Now i know that cancer and swelling of the heart is well bad, and not a subject to laugh about. But i read it myself on an Internet site, that Thiamin deficiency can make it difficult (because of muscle cramp) to get out of the squatting position. That must be a bit shit though, don't you think? A big night out, drinks, drinks, dancing.....more drinks, didn't think once about Thiamin deficiency! Got up gone to the toilet....SHIT!! Then found out you couldn't stand up, apparently these syptoms can last for extended periods of time. I've heard of being in the toilet for a long time but....damn, a shit that lasts 3-4 hours. That can't be good. I said to my friend you could eliminate this problem by doing a handstand against the toilet. He said well no i don't think that would work at least not forever because what if it goes to your hands. I said yeah you'd end up like the crocodiles and end up drowning, except this time you be drowning in toilet water.

Something must be done to tackle this....

I think me and a couple of the people i know will be safe as they do not drink to excess like me. I take multi vitamins too and have a well balanced diet so i don't think i'm at risk. If i discover any more major crisis' i'll let you know.

Fu**ing Policy!

Does anybody else find policy a bit of a drag?!

Well I do!
What's eating me you ask?!
Well let me tell you...

Policies, I've come to the conclusion, is a clever way of assholes of certain companies and organisations, not mentioning any names (college), dodging the bullet. Basically what happened is when I signed up for a two year IT course, they said that you could do an extra A level along side it. I thought "Yay, it'll give me a break from my IT and its another qualification." Maybe i should have demanded that i read all the small print before hand because if i'd have know for one second that this A level, would be an anchor around my neck like it has been then I'd have told them where to shove it.

Ok get to the story Darren....

Well I've had a lot of problems recently and after christmas I thought I'd do the sensible thing and tackle my issues and by tackling them I would need time to do this. So i said to my A level tutor that I was quitting my A level, she said I had to have my personal tutors position. I said to him, look, I don't want to do it anymore and I need the time to sort out my life. He said fair enough, the next news.

I was talking to my friend about it, he walks past " You're not quitting your A level!"
I was like "Excuse me!?"
So I just internally thought to myself "Screw that, I'm quitting and there's not a goddamn thing that you or anybody else can do to stop me!" How untrue that was.

So he collars me next lesson and tells me to wait behind after class, which I did I might add.
He says to me "Darren, you can't quit your A level, because I've talked to the head of college and he says that by college policy you can't drop it until the end of the 1st year"

So its ok then head of college, I'll just suffer until I'm carried out on a stretcher! Thank you very much.

So me being me, I've took the matter into my own hands!!! I've talked to my counsellor and she has agreed to talk to this so-called head of college and get him to remove me from that goddamn A level course. Without affecting my IT. I'd already decided anyway that I was going to call his bluff. Let him throw me out then, I'd like to see him try!!

I have been there for nearly three years and I'm a good student, thank you very much, i do not deserve to be treated in this manner. Its not like i'm the only one, a lad in my clas has dropped his A level and he's still been allowed to carry on.

Bloody policy! Kiss My A**e

Like or Accept?

If anybody is reading this, then you probably know i'm gay. I came out when i was the tender age of 13, too defiant to hold it in, it came with a price. A price that i'm beginning to realise. Don't worry loyal readers this isn't a suicide note...

I went to primary school and loved it, yet secondary school chewed me up and spat me out. It couldn't process me as I am. It only accepted those who were repressed and hid "in the closet" and the bullies. I was neither of those things, although looking back, I would give anything to change that, I have to live with the fact that i have made my life and my screwed up head the way it is. I know that there's other factors that contribute but all in all its my fault. If I had just been that bit stronger and held on, I'd have done my GCSE's, left school with some half decent qualifications and felt like i'm worth more, maybe...

I have hid so much for so long, and i'm tired of it. Bullies..."Urrr it's Darren, he's gay! He's dirty! He's scum!"

I'm not the second two things but I am gay. Why the fu** did they have to bully me?! Do they think I like being gay!? Why would anybody?!

This sounds pathetic, I know. But i hurt inside!!!!

I wear this mask at college and everybody seems to think i'm ok, but i'm not....nobody sees that, they just see this outspoken, good for a laugh, gay guy who isn't repressed or inhibited by anything or anyone. They have no idea how much energy that consumes. But i can't let the mask slip, otherwise they won't even talk to me, and that would be like being back at school.

To me...that is a fate worse than death, to be invisible.
I feel empty lately, I feel..numb.

This sounds like i want to die, I know, but i don't haha, I just want all this to stop. I want friends that care about me outside of college, I want a decent social life, I want to have money to go out, I want to go new places and do new things, I want to forge lasting friendships/relationships.

I told one of my friends from college that i'm socially retarded, after he hit a raw nerve and said to me "You don't have a life!" I think it was a joke but I took it seriously and that's one more thing, one more memory that I can't get out of my head.