Talk Shows

Don't you just love chat shows!? I love watching them, first thing in a morning, eating your cereal, taking a sip of your tea and then....WALLOP! Some woman who's found out her husband is a lying ba**ard and has cheated on her a total of 6 times in their two year relationship, lands a punch, square-on to the man's face. Then its the same old sh**, the host calling security, security dashing in...then dashing out again for more security, when the woman decides to give them a fat lip.

Oh the drama of it all, so funny.

My favourite would have to be Ricky Lake. She is so funny. It's amazing how intelligent, yet stupid at the same time somebody can be. I think its the American blood in her. She complains about cheaters, comes out with all this analytical sh**, then slates them, then when they come on stage saying "I tell you what Ricky, I tell you what, right now. I'd do it again!" The audience gasps, its like a pantomime. But the thing that annoys me sooo fu**ing much is that they repeat the same bloody sentence over and over and over and over again. Their girlfriend is in their face and they're just sat there saying "I'd do it again, I'd do it again, I'd do it again!" There's Ricky just stood there like a tub of lard going "Ooooooh, man, oooooooh, man!" Seriously, how retarded can you get.

Sally Jessy Raphael just needs shooting, her show is so boring.

Jeremy Kyle is the worst. The people on that show, they are the worst since Jerry Springer, and shows were good, let me point that out for a start.I love how his guests are never right about anything! Unless, and here is the cryteria:

• You've beaten drugs or alcoholism.
• You're a young girl/boy, who is in pieces as soon as they get on-stage.
• A father who has taken on somebody else's children.
• And if you've matched all three cryteria, you get a holiday, a lifetime supply of chocolate (joking) and a public declaration, from Jeremy, that you're a model citizen or a "man" or a really nice "lady".

Anybody else is sh**!!! You are worse than an ex-drug-abuser or alcoholic. It's fu**ed up isn't it.

Another thing I love about the show is that he takes the moral high ground, frequently throughout the show. It was in the paper and on the Internet that he'd been spotted in a bar, drunk as a skunk. How can he do that, when he did this?! It's ridiculous. This kid was like "I never see my mum because she's always at the pub" Jeremy says "You, madam are dispicable! He's your child for God's sake. Show some compassion."

The only niggle I have with those few sentences is.

How are you any better?!

Do you know what i mean though. I'm never tuning in to that show again, unless I need cheering up because it makes me angry.